What the Church Stopped During the Pandemic That It Needs to Start Again

During the pandemic of 2020-2021, the church where I was a transitional pastor had, probably like your church, a struggle knowing which programing to do or not to do. From November of 2020 to February of 2021 almost daily we discussed whether we were going to meet in person and online or just online. Fortunately for me, the church was built for broadcasting and had all the bells and whistles for a great video production. We could even record my message and the worship set ahead of time and have just a few of us live to do announcement before the broadcast.

This was a period of time in the church’s life where we had to stop doing some things that had been a staple for the church. In-person worship and in-person small groups hit the top of the list. Other things that were put on pause were children’s church, outreach, Wednesday activities to name a few. We didn’t shake hands or hug necks.

We are now “officially” outside of the pandemic. Yes, we still live with the effects of the pandemic, but life has taken on a normality, even a new normal.

This new normal includes changes in what and how we do things in our churches. But there is also another side to this. There are things that were stopped during the pandemic that now need to be started again. Here’s a list of just a few of these things.

1. Print a complete bulletin or worship guide

Maybe your church never stopped this. Good for you! Many did and many still don’t. It was stopped because we were concerned about the spread of Covid-19. That’s not a reason anymore.

You may or may not know this, but my wife and I attend a lot of different churches. We are becoming “experts” on church services and church practices in our little Baptist world. Having a worship guide is a bigger deal than you might think. We frequently attend churches that have no worship guide. If they do have one, often it’s simply an order of service with nothing more. No website. No phone number. No names of the ministers with contact information. No calendar of events. Do yourself a favor, print a real and complete worship guide that looks good. Put some color in it. At this point, if you don’t, it just looks lazy.

2. Start Back Wednesday Evening Programing

Yes, our life patterns have changed. Our members and even pastors have gotten used to little or no programming on Wednesday evenings. But important things took place on this night and are not taking place anywhere else. Even if it is a small prayer service, it is a prayer service. God still hears the prayers of his gathered people. Jesus said he’d be in their midst even if it is only two or three. That alone is worth it. But there is more: Youth would meet for worship and inspiration. Children would meet and learn missions and Scripture in a way that Sunday morning could not accomplish. In some churches, families would gather for a meal at church, then go to their areas. Wednesdays were opportunities for men to group with other men and women to group with other women for discipleship.

3. Conduct Personal Outreach

Over the years outreach has changed. When I began as a new believer in the dark ages of the 1980s, we would “cold call” on outreach night. That’s right. I and a couple of others, usually another guy and a girl would have the contact information of a person who visited our church. We would head out on a Monday or Tuesday night to visit them. Can you believe the nerve! We’d show up at someone’s house unannounced, then ask if we could come in and talk to them about their soul and their spiritual lives. I did this kind of thing every week for about 30 years. This is not what I’m talking about.

What I am talking about is following up on guests but doing it appropriately and personally. Maybe we don’t show up at their home unannounced, but you could make an appointment. It doesn’t have to be at their home. It could be at a coffee shop or some other place. It could be a phone call, that progresses into a meeting in person. I often have my first meeting with new people on Zoom. Other ideas could include a handwritten note or text them as a way of introduction.

You can still have outreach groups meet together to do all of these things. If they can’t meet together physically, they could select a night where each one does their outreach assignments, then they all get on Zoom at a predetermined time to report to one another. It motivates and validates their work. It also increased community and fellowship. These are just ideas.

The point I’m making is that people are more open to other ways of communicating now than ever before. Social media being a big one. So, leverage all the communication streams that you are able, remembering to make it a personal outreach as well.

4. Offer Evangelism Training

Research has concluded that personal evangelism training increases the participants positive outlook on evangelism and confidence in them personally sharing their faith.[i] From my work in training church members in personal evangelism as well as promoting, and producing personal evangelism resources, I’ve seen the following changes in people and churches from a consistent and quality evangelism equipping strategy:

• An increased understanding of the gospel

• An appreciation of the importance of the gospel

• A greater ability to speak on spiritual things

• A dynamic devotional life

• Greater involvement in outreach ministries of the church.

• A growing participation in the stewardship of their time, talents, and treasure

Honestly, there is no downside of offering personal evangelism training on a regular basis. There are many ways to do this and many different models to choose from. However, the choices can be overwhelming. I have a couple of ways that do not interfere with your current church schedule or require a long-term commitment.

But personal evangelism training has hit on hard times. Some of the trainings assume more knowledge of the Gospel of Christ than others. Some are more programmatic and others more relational. The bottom line is, offer something. I’ve suggested options in other blogs. You can find them here.

Ripple Effect of Evangelism

Motivations for Evangelism

5. Take Up Offering During Services

Pass the plate, bucket, sack or whatever you used before. Go back to doing that. Sure, leave the offering boxes up and also promote giving online, by text or app. It’s all good and you should use them all.

By taking up an offering during the services, you allow people to actually make giving financially to God part of their service of worship. Family members need to see their parents or significant others giving a tithe and offering to God. It is a good thing.

I don’t remember a lot of my dad’s participation in church, but one thing I remember is that he was adamant about us giving financially to God’s work. When he didn’t attend church, he made sure I did, and he would send me with a check to put in the offering plate. That’s a hard discipline to model with an automatic draft or giving over a text. So, give your membership the option of giving in the offering plate by passing the plate at your services.

6. Have a Greeting Time in the Services

A lot of ink has been spilled debating on whether churches should have a time to recognize guests and greet one another. I believe there are good ways to do this and less good ways. I’ve been exposed to both, and I’ve participated in both. Guests generally don’t like to be singled out. I’d say about 99% of them don’t like that. However, all guests want to feel that they are welcome. Having a general and short time where people recognize one another, saying, “good morning” or “I’m glad to see you, my name is _______, what’s yours?” is not out of order.

Before the greeting, your church could ask for everyone to scan the QR code on the back of the seat in front of them or to fill out a physical connection card, to drop in the offering plate when it passes. By the way, that’s another good reason for taking up an offering.

7. Leader Training

Having regular training for deacons, department directors, teachers and other leaders has always been a challenge. The pandemic shut a lot of that down and we’ve suffered from it.

You and I both know how important it is to have ongoing training. We can all use some equipping, especially when you have new leaders moving up. Technology has made training more versatile and convenient through video platforms, most can be recorded and made available later “on demand.” I urge you to poll your leaders and discuss how best your church can provide ongoing equipping for the different needs that are in the ministries of your church.

A great first step would be to take all your small group and department leaders to this year’s Associational Sunday School/Small Group Leader training. Hurry up, it’s happening on January 27, 2023. The theme is “Teaching for Life Transformation.” You can find out more about it here:

Teaching to Transform

The next blog will be on the subject of things that we did during the pandemic in church that we need to keep doing.

[i] Kwan, Albert Tak Yin. How Do Participants in an Evangelism Training Program Assess its Impact on Their Ability and Confidence in Sharing Their Personal Faith? D.Min. Project. 2016. https://bit.ly/3st83th

I THOUGHT I’D BE FURTHER ALONG THAN THIS

“Do not despise these small beginnings, for the Lord rejoices to see the work begin…” Zechariah 4:10a, NLT.

Have you had this thought before, “By this time, I thought I’d be further along?” I do. And it comes this time of year, at the close of the year. But as I become older, I do a lot more self-reflecting than I did as a younger man. I also understand myself better and I also have come to realize the difference between what is most important and what is just the pressure of the urgent.

I’m an optimist and my direction of orientation is forward; always been that way. Personality wise, on the DISC inventory I’m an “I” with a close “D”. I don’t even register in the “C” category! On the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) I come out as an ENFJ. On the Enneagram, I identify with the type 7, Social subtype. On the StrengthsFinder 2.0, my top 5 in descending order are Strategic, Input, Belief, Achiever and Maximizer. I could go on and on with assessments, but you’re not that interested in me. To be honest, I’m not either. Assessments don’t take you where you want to go, but they can help you understand where you are.

By lamenting on not being as far along as I'd like, I’m not speaking in terms of physical distance, but in metaphor for life. For me, I’m disappointed that I’m not further along in my Christ-like character traits. I’m impatient, moody, over-indulgent, selfish, anxious, and inconsistent. That’s just what came to mind in a nanosecond. I got some work to do!

There are different categories of “wanting to be further along” than we are now. Perhaps for you, thinking you would be further along by now, means that you’d be married, or remarried. Perhaps it has to do with other aspects and dimensions of your relationships. Your desire to be "further along” could relate to career goals, physical and health desires. I shouldn’t even have to mention this, but money. Maybe you thought you’d have more of it, or to be able to spend less of it. Personal growth, mental health and resilience are important and more so this time of year. Bottom line, we just all want to be happy. We thought we’d be happier than we are now.

So, what do we do? Complain? Give-up? Blame God and creation? We may for a minute, but then we need to take responsibility and decide: Do I want to change you fill in the blank? This is the first choice and no one else can make for you. You must decide for yourself. It’s obvious to you and to others that there needs to be a change, but that is not the question. The question is, “Do you want to change?”

Some people get comfortable in their disappointment. They believe that they deserve it. They think that if they try to improve, they will just fail. Someone once said that you only fail when you cease to try. Failure is never final until you give up.

Here’s what I’m offering. I’ll give you a tried-and-true way to get further along in one area of your life in 2023. You pick the area and work the seven-step plan and by this time next year you will look back with satisfaction and can celebrate.

Before we look at the steps and the short description of each, (not complete but enough to get the idea of it) I want to make a few suggestions. First, just read over the seven steps and their descriptions. Don’t try to “do” them but get familiar with them.

Second, when you are ready to start working on the steps, I suggest you find a place where you will not be disturbed or distracted.

Third, give yourself some time. Work in 45-minute intervals. Take a break, like for a few hours or a day and then come back and work on it again. Don’t think you have to do it all in one sitting.

Fourth, review and make changes. This is a working document that can be revised. Just speaking of myself, I tend to set too high a goal and take on too much. It is a good thing when you make a more realistic target for yourself.

Fifth, remember, whatever targets you set for yourself and even if you don’t meet them, you are making progress, nonetheless. That is what's important. That's worth celebrating.

Sixth, be thinking about one to three people you could share this. Pick people who are supportive of you but will also speak the truth to you. If you’re desire for success in this is strong and you don’t feel like you can confide in any of the people you know yet, you may want to hire a coach for a few sessions, or at least one. You will be amazed at how a trained coach can help you navigate the issues in even one session.

Ready? Let’s go over the seven steps for where you want to be in 2023.

STEP ONE: IDENTIFY YOUR TARGETED AREA OF GROWTH

What one specific thing do you want to change about your life? Perhaps you have one already in mind. Write it down. You need to name it. It needs to be written in such a way that you will know when you have reached it or when you have not. The more specific the better.

To help with this, I’ve provided an excellent resource below on “Recovery, Wellness and Building Resilience". It lists eight different categories of life. It is like my Wheel of Life that is used in coaching. You may recognize one area that you want to focus on, and then you can name something specific in your life that corresponds to it.

STEP TWO: KNOW AND ACCEPT THE REALITY OF WHERE YOU ARE NOW

The first time my family and I went to the Mall of Georgia, we were looking for the Shoe Department shoe store. Sure enough, when we looked at the mall directory, the store was listed as being on the second floor near the east end. Problem was, we needed to know where we were to get to where we wanted to be. Fortunately for us, there was a red dot on the mall directory that read, “You are here.” Now that we knew where we were, we could get to the store we wanted. Same is true with your targeted desire.

Many don’t know themselves and are even less aware of how they come across to other people. Self-knowledge and self-awareness are the first place to begin. The reformed theologian John Calvin even wrote in the very beginning of his Institutes of the Christian Religion: “Our wisdom, in so far as it ought to be deemed true and solid Wisdom, consists almost entirely of two parts: the knowledge of God and of ourselves. But as these are connected together by many ties, it is not easy to determine which of the two precedes and gives birth to the other.” Wisdom in life is tied to knowing God and knowing self. We should be students of both.

One of the best ways to know more of self is to develop an understanding of emotional intelligence. This will apply to all areas of life, not just what you have chosen to work on. One of the best tools I know of for self-discovery is the Enneagram. I have been so impressed with its potential for personal discovery and growth that I became a certified practitioner, working with individuals, church staff, and non-profit boards of directors.

Doing a 360 Degree Assessment is another consideration to discover how other people perceive your behavior and attitudes. This assessment is sent out to between 15 and 25 people in your social circle for them to answer questions about you anonymously!

The bottom line is not what resources you use, but that you come to a true knowledge of your own strengths, weaknesses, blind-spots, and tendencies. A true self-understanding of how you show up in the world will help you in all your growth areas, not just this one.

STEP THREE: DESCRIBE IN REALISTIC TERMS WHERE YOU WANT TO BE IN THIS ONE DESIRE BY END OF 2023

In the previous step I wrote about going to the Mall of Georgia. We didn't just want to go to the mall, we wanted to go to a particular store in the mall. Therefore, we knew when we made it. If we had just said we wanted to go to the mall, then any store or none would do. We’d just be killing time.

For you, what will it look like to make this goal? What you will feel? What will others see if you make this goal? Be tangible in your description. It could be a few sentences, or it could be several paragraphs.

STEP FOUR: LIST YOUR TOP FOUR TO SEVEN CHALLENGES TO ACHIEVING THIS DESIRE

You will need to be aware that anything worth doing is going to cost. It will take effort and tenacity. To prepare yourself for possible setbacks and problems answer these questions: What are the issues surrounding this? What are the challenges that need to be addressed? What am I afraid of? What do I stand to lose? What do I stand to lose if I don’t do this? What is my self-talk saying? Is my self-talk true? What is true? Who and what should I be listening to?

STEP FIVE: DISCERN THE LEADING OF GOD IN THIS

The question for your life is not: “Is God at work?” God is always at work in your life. The question is: “What is God at work doing and will I join him?” Some questions to ask yourself may be: What do you feel God is seeking to do in your life through this? What values is God working in you and bringing out? What areas of wounding or struggle might God be touching? Who do you have praying with you about this? What could Scripture say about this? What wisdom might other trusted sources have on this?

STEP SIX: PLAN YOUR STEPS THAT WILL LEAD YOU TO THIS ONE DESIRE

You don’t need to make a lot of steps. These steps that you plan don’t have to be big, they can be small or even “baby steps” like Dr. Marvin gave the character played by Bill Murray in the movie “What About Bob.” But these steps need to be specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and time-bound. See the image below for more direction on this.

After you write down your steps and have made sure they are SMART. Then share them with someone you trust who will give you honest but caring feedback. Consider their feedback and make any adjustments you deem prudent.

STEP SEVEN: TAKE THE NEXT STEP

A Chinese proverb stated it this way, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step.” Take the step. Make the leap. In reality, you have already begun. You have thought through. You have struggled. You have prayed and debated the issues and challenges. Now you have come to the point of implementing your new future. Is there anything left undone?

Share these steps with someone who will help you to be accountable to your own goals. You need a tribe: Your church, small group, friends, family, or coworkers, etc. You may want to involve a coach here as well.

There will always be new issues and challenges that will come up, but having worked through these steps, you at the place where you can go ahead. Today is the day! We can hardly wait to see what you will be in 2023.

Five Ways to Stay Mentally Healthy During the Holidays

Popular culture pictures the Christmas season as a Hallmark movie. We could call it “The Hallmark Effect.” Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying there's anything wrong with a Hallmark movie. Just don’t confuse it with real life. In these kinds of movies, you have picturesque small towns, cozy coffee shops, attractive people, beautiful clothes, great coffee, tastefully decorated homes, tasteful coffee, and it always ending with the high of finding or restoring a loving relationship. There is also lots of coffee if you didn’t already get that.

For many, the holidays bring on a different kind of challenge. I for one love the holidays. Since I serve in a support role to churches, the end of the year is a time when I can slow down. This time of year, the churches, and pastors I serve are very busy with their Thanksgiving and Christmas celebrations. Karen (my wife) and I have saved up all year for gifts and we enjoy shopping together and being able to spend money without debt. We spend time with family, give gifts, and enjoy fun and good food.

Not everyone has this experience. For many, the holidays are times of sadness and regret. I know families who lost a loved one in death. It is a challenge for them to enjoy this time of year. I know others who, because of addiction, dread this time of year due to the social triggers it brings. Others have gone through separation in their families due to disruptive events. Parents and children of divorce find this time extremely challenging. It hurts no matter who is to blame or if no one is to blame.

With the above in mind, I offer just five suggestions for those who struggle with their mental health during the holidays.

1. Keep realistic expectations during the holidays.

I already talked about the Hallmark effect. These movies and the ones like them aren’t real life. The worst thing that happens in these movies is that someone got regular milk in their latte’ instead of soy. When arguments take place, they are resolved quickly and harmony is restored.

Stay grounded. Sure, we all have holiday expectations. We want it to be perfect. But it is not going to be perfect because nobody around us is perfect, including ourselves. During these times, some people are nice, but many people are stressed. Thanksgiving and Christmas are opportunities for us to put our best foot forward, but you also must keep in mind that human nature is not suspended during this time of year.

Be optimistic, but don’t let your optimism go so far that you become disappointed when all your hopes and dreams don’t materialize. Have expectations but keep them in check.

2. Talk about your losses.

If you have not thoroughly processed the losses you have experienced, confide in a person who will be able to empathize with you. I didn’t say sympathize but empathize. What you need is a person who can understand what you are experiencing not someone who will just feel sorry for you.

Finding a recovery group during this time of year may be the best gift you give to yourself. Some years ago, my wife and I experienced a trauma in our lives we couldn't process by ourselves. Someone we trusted strongly recommended we at least try a support group. I’m so glad we did. It was hard at first but sharing our feelings and fears with others who endured similar trauma activated real healing power. Often, we tell ourselves that “no one understands” or that “nobody will care”. Don’t you believe it. There are people like you, yes, just like you who want to hear your story. You need to hear their story as well.

3. Don’t go over your limits and avoid your triggers.

The celebrations this time of year seem to all have at least one thing in common: Too much of a good thing. There is too much food, too much eating, too much drinking, too much spending, too much travelling, and too much preparation. Sure, we want this time of year to be special. I remember when I was a pastor, Karen and I one year were invited to 17 Christmas parties. It was our first year in our church and we decided that if we were invited, we would go. Not a good plan. We love being with our church and eating all the food but by the time Christmas came around I was looking more like Santa Clause than I wanted. You don’t have to go to a party just because you were invited. Make sure you get some rest, even from the fun stuff.

Like it or not, January is coming. You cannot live like the holidays will never end. As believers we can live like Christmas will never end, but not the holiday.

Don’t put yourself in situations where you know you will be vulnerable. If being around some people brings you down, minimize the time you must spend with them. Perhaps you can even control the environment and the amount of time you spend with them. If you must go to an event or a place where you can be triggered, tell someone you trust to help you by holding you accountable for your actions. If you can bring a safe person with you to that gathering, do so.

4. Make new memories and traditions.

We can reach a stage in our lives where the old traditions end pulling us down instead of lifting us up. They’ve stopped reminding us of things like gratitude and joy. It may be time to start some new traditions. Change the way you give gifts. Serve in a charity of some kind that would benefit others. Insert a new game or challenge in your holiday festivities. Let your imagination go wild. The best way to move past an old tradition is to replace it with a new one. The bottom line on all this is for us to remember the real meaning of Christmas. God’s fulfilled his promise to send a Savior to rescue us from our sin and redeem us so that we may be restored in our relationship with God.

5. Focus on connecting with others.

We are created for community. Isolation is not good for the soul and being alone during the holiday season is even worse. Try to connect. Call someone and meet them for coffee. Bring a little gift of appreciation for their friendship.

Place yourself in situations that allow for invitations to social events. Hang out with different people than you usually do. Even if it’s just for a little while. The Bibles states it this way: “A man who has friends must himself be friendly….” (Proverbs 18:24, NKJV)

Volunteer to serve others. I mentioned this earlier, but it is still good for connecting with others. There is a natural and long-lasting connection that happens between people who are working toward something greater than themselves. When you volunteer to do good to someone else you are investing in their lives. But even more important you are living out the Christian life. You will be blessed by blessing others in ways not imagined. Jesus said, “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” (Acts 20:35b, NKJV) So, serve in a toy drive, a food distribution, or a holiday meal for the needy. Look around you at the needs of others, perhaps you will be inspired to start something that will meet a need not yet addressed. Your life and your heart will grow in the process.

I pray the best for you this Christmas season. Thank you for allowing me to serve you. Merry Christmas and I truly desire for you to have a happy New Year.